IQ tests
>> Thursday 27 May 2010
I have completed intellectual assessments on three students recently and cannot for the life of me remember which one was which.
Read more...
Someone is controlling my drinking...
>> Wednesday 26 May 2010
and it's not me.
I bought a posh new tonic water this week to complement my passion for botanically flavoured gin.
I treated myself to a double this evening, over ice in a long glass.
Have to admit, I was a tad disappointed. But battled through the drink, blaming the new tonic for the odd taste.
I have just walked back into the kitchen, and discovered my jigger - still full of the double measure I'd poured.
It never made it into the glass.
Dear diary...
Yesterday I turned up for my nail appointment.
A week late.
In itself, this was not a huge surprise to me. I may as well read my tea leaves each morning rather than my diary.
However, the fact that I burst into tears as I left the shop was rather more of a surprise.
And the cherry was having to then walk back into the shop to pick up the Starbucks I'd left on the counter.
Good job they are lovely people.
Blogging stress
>> Monday 24 May 2010
See the comment I have posted to the last post? Well, that's the 4th time I've posted that comment. Or so I thought.
Seem to be suffering from some kind of blogblindness. Another inherent flaw with this blog.
It is a solid five minute walk from my office to the kettle.
>> Wednesday 19 May 2010
1) Set off to the kettle.
2) Arrive. No mug or tea bag.
3) Return to office.
4) Pick up mug.
5) Walk to reception.
6) Realise my mistake. Walk to kettle.
7) Return to reception to fetch mug.
8) Return to kettle. No teabag.
9) Return to office to get tea bag.
10) Return to kettle.
11) Boil kettle.
12) Bemoan not switching it on last time I was here.
13) Return to office with cup of tea.
14) Find tea bag in pocket.
Top shopping tips
>> Friday 14 May 2010
Finn has discovered a perfect way of making sure he gets what he needs while my brain is suffering the side effects of Mum's cancer.
"Mum, today I need you to shop for things beginning with B. We need beans and bread ."
Me "But you need tracksuit trousers too. How will I remember that?"
Finn "Bracksuit"
Keeping it simple. This boy knows his mother well. And it worked. I stood in Waitrose, goofily wondering what I was there for, until I remembered "B" and managed to get both bread and beans. Genius. Bracksuit was also duly purchased.
Ouch
My very berry herbal tea was overfilling in the Morrisons DIY tea making machine. I reached in to stop it and stuck my hand directly under the hot water jet.
Ouch.
FYI people at Morrisons do not understand the need to treat scalds and look at you very funny when you ask for a bowl of water in which to plunge your hand.
They look at you even funnier when you sit soaking it for 10 minutes to try to stop it blistering. Dumbasses.
Ouch.
Seatbrakes
>> Tuesday 11 May 2010
Following the fiasco of the handbrake and the car and the front door the other day, Finn is understandably lacking some of the faith he'd previously held in his mothers unfailing ability to be ace all the time. As we arrived home from school today and I eased the car smoothly into the drive, he looked at me earnestly and said "Mum, is the car going to be ok here?". I made a concerted effort to put on a calming tone and looked reassuringly into his eyes whilst patting the handbrake. "Finn, I have taken great care. You have nothing to worry about, the seatbelt is well and truly on."
Read more...Hotel Breakfast
>> Monday 10 May 2010
Just got out of the lift and went hunting for the dining room on the first floor. The man who got into the lift when I got out smiled encouragingly to me when I saw him again, at breakfast, downstairs.
Read more...Pho-Pah
Fucking hell. I am a degree educated, reasonable French speaker. And I can't remember how to spell faux-pas.
See comments to Conference.
*doublesigh*
Fuckwittery-in-action. In case you all thought we were making this up.
Inherent flaws
There is an inherent flaw to this blog. I have been sat here all evening, racking my brain to remember the dumbass things I've been doing all week.
And can't remember most of them.
x
Dogging
Dad set off in the car to take Sadie lab for a nice long walk up the hill.
Without the dog.
It's not just us.
Magnifying front door windows - amazing
My drive slopes down. At the bottom is my front door. I parked my car and came inside to make some lunch. A while later I walked past my front door. "Hmm. How come my car looks like it's actually touching my front door? How can the glass have suddenly become magnified?" I genuinely had all those thoughts before realising. I had not put the handbrake on. My car had rolled into my house. We couldn't get out of the front door and had to escape out the back. Sigh.
Read more...Bubbles
Last night I put liquid soap on my toothbrush. Realised before it hit my mouth and the brush hit the bin.
Read more...Conference
Here I am in Nottingham ready for my international conference. Black suit, black shirt, black shoes, black socks. Black boxers even. Sharp.
Brown belt.
Handkerchief
>> Friday 7 May 2010
Today I went out with pants instead of a handkerchief. Not small white pants. Big black boxers.
Read more...Child abandonment
>> Saturday 1 May 2010
Christ... Tamsin takes bike to bike shop and I take daughters to swimming lesson. I forget the swimming bag. Daughter has swimming costume on under clothes. They know the ropes so, dazed and preoccupied, I suggest that they go round to the entrance and into swimming themselves while I zoom home in the car to pick up the bag.
Walking back to the car a nagging feeling comes across me and I realise that I'll be too late with the bag to be of any practical use and return to the swimming club.
Which is locked.
No swimming today. I just narrowly missed leaving two eight year olds in the middle of town by themselves for half an hour.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)